I'm not sure if the character of "Teenape" is supposed to be an actual ape who acts like a hip-hop artist with brain damage, or if he's just a brain damaged guy with an ape mask fetish. Don't watch the film with the idea that you'll find out.
The beginning of the film is baffling. Teenape confronts a pirate wench. You’d think it was a tie-in to some other Teenape movie, but it doesn't seem to be... If you're a glutton for punishment, you could check out the Low Budget Pictures website and marvel at their other films like Blood Trim and Heather & Puggley Drop a Deuce.
Do yourself a favor, though, and just skip to the opening credits at 4:30.
A couple important notes:
Most frequently used word: "bitch".
Best way not to pay royalties for music: Use really, really old music, or get your friends' bands on board. What would local bands ever do without bad movies?
Best way to make your grandmother cry: 6:34.
Other notable stops and quotable quotes:
10:00 - "If you remember to not be a dick then this weekend will be smooth sailing."
15:00 - I don't even know what to say about this.
20:10 - Obligatory campfire scene with scary story. "I don't want poopies to shoot out of my butt cleavage!"
28:00 - MMF: Monkey, Man, Female sex. Faux frontal male nudity.
32:20 - Things get dicey for Teenape in a simian-style ripoff of Richard Connell's "The Most Dangerous Game" (and the 1994 movie Surviving the Game with Ice-T.)
39:00 - Tim Conway and Tolkien should sue over "Dorf the Hobbit".
39:40 - What is in the monkey's shorts?? "Anyone who wears the magical 80s headband gains inspirational strength."
45:00 - Oh, God, skip this.
47:00 - Even retarded people should be insulted.
55:00 - Baghead appears.
56:00 - The hoax within a hoax that negates the entire movie.
57:45 - The hoax within a hoax now has a twist and an improbably form-fitting pot lid.
59:05 - The hoax within a hoax's twist has a twist.
